Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
