Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
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