My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
