: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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