Me. At least after what I've been through.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I need to sanitize my soul.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
