Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
