I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
