Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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