How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
