apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
