why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
