Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
