so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
