problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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