Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Randomize