Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
