Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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