can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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