my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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