I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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