new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
