He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Randomize
