I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
