Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
