He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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