It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
