she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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