i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
