I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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