so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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