Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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