I want to walk on stilts...naked
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
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