Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
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