i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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