Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
just tell him i said nine months
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize