I skipped work to stalk him.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
