when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize