I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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