she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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