my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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