If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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