What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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