i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
