apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize