Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
