problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
