redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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