First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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