the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
