he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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